Why not to eat pineapple?, Why not to eat pineapple during pregnancy?, why not to eat pineapple when pregnant ? Why not eat pineapple core ? Which are asked frequently on Google web search but it’s hard to find a proper reason at one place so I decided to write this article,to educate people about harmful affects of eating pineapple.
If you love to eat pineapple then you must know the fact. This juicy delicious fruit is actually eating you from inside. This is the only fruit that could eat you literally, yes it’s true. The juicy, tasty, little fruit can eat your flesh. Pineapple actually is a Brazilian fruit, in 1493 it was imported from Brazil to Europe by Christopher Columbus.
It was also spread by natives around the South America and to the Caribbean and the Indies islands, it is very popular among the tropical countries. This Brazilian fruit have a funny history in European society, in 1700 century, somehow it was became a status symbol, people actually and intentionally took a pineapple to parties for show off, they carried it around for weeks until the pineapple started rot, amazing isn’t it?
You’ll be considered richest and coolest kid if you had a pineapple under your arm, that was the sign of status symbol in the 1700s and no other fruit got that power till today because pineapples were imported fruit and that’s why it was expensive, it cost about 5000 pounds each, which is around $8000 by today’s standards and still no food is as much expensive as pineapple was.
This is the only expensive and flesh-eating fruit in world, actually you may have noticed that after eating a freshly cut piece of this fruit, it leaves your tongue feeling like you just took to it with sandpaper, and people even experienced bleeding tongues, gums and lips after eating pineapple, but do you know why it happened? Because pineapples contains an enzyme called bromelain, it can break down protein in our flesh.
The enzyme Bromelain is a mixture of two enzymes and several other substances in smaller quantities and it has the ability to break down protein so pineapple is advised to used in cooking to make meat more softer and easy to cook. Pineapple really can eat the tender skin inside you mouth, so be careful whenever you going to eat. To avoid this some people suggest to cut the fruit in pieces and let it sit at room temperature so it will lessen the effects of Bromelain, but that is not true, in room temperature it can survive at least a week, this thing only avoidable if you eat cooked or grilled pineapple.
Posted by: Mili Das
Re Post from: Here
Here are some YouTube videos which answers your questions ” why not to eat pineapple?”
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What,Why, How …are the three questions I use to evaluate all my actions and in case I am not able to answer any of these,I avoid doing those things.
So if i start introspecting on one of my recent action then here is how i will do it.
What I did? Yes i didn’t use my WhatsApp for a week.
Why I did? To cutoff communication channel and find my sanity.
How I did it? Using the “focus mode” of my phone.
All this sounds so out of context so if I have to make sense,I have to start narrating things from start of this week and here I go…..
I have been feeling restless from past few months and as per my understanding that is due accumulation of many disturbing and unresolved problems which includes personal life emotional break point and professional life burnout along with fomo (for people like me,fomo stands for fear of missing out). Although I consider myself as a strong person when it comes to controlling my emotions but this time around it not that easy for me. Maybe because the factors affecting me included loosing on people and things which made me a strong person in past few years ,Also I was caught off-guard by that while tackling other things of my life.
Source:Google
This may sound depressing but honestly it was not because I knew the things happening around were not in my control so I decided to not dwell on them in my own mind and do more of an emotional damage.Also,for the kind of person I am,It will take a world war to actually make me depress but having said that it was a serious concern since I was not able to sleep for continuous nights and have to wash my face multiple times to avoid those teary eyes from which I was not letting tears to reach till my cheeks.
At that moment I decided to take back control of life steering and the action I took was to not to use my WhatsApp.
Small action
Pretty small step,but as I learned from one of my reading of last year “The atomic habits” these small/atomic actions actually makes a difference and till this point I think it actually did.
I call it a small action because for me WhatsApp was about talking to 1-2 people at most and all other hundreds of messages were all complimentary so I decided to disconnect with them temporarily.I turned on “focus mode” in my phone while keeping whatsapp in the list of disturbing applications along with Pinterest. Also,to support that i have all my notifications off for other applications like sms.
Learning from another of my read “The compound effect” ,I knew it couldn’t be done so randomly.I have to support this with an alternatives which were less distracting so installed back Snapchat after 3-5 years just to have one way communication and to stay aware about the happening around my work place in an invisible mode.
Source: Google
Since Whatsapp is the easiest and fastest way of communication and for people of my age,it is almost impossible to get rid of it.Afterall cutting off people permanently is not a solution and also, the messages in office ,family and college groups are actually something we need to keep up with in our life. Not to forget about whatsapp calls from cab driver,family members or messages which need your urgent attention but not making all these a reason,I decided to stop using whatsapp for a week.
What happens when you don’t use whatsapp
What actually happens is that you get extra time of your day for yourself and also are able to eliminate the not so necessary messaging and consumption of disturbing news. Another important thing is that since you have eliminated the communication channel you are in no position to take help of other shoulders to get temporary relief from pain and not the permanent solution which comes from within. For me particularly,it is not possible to replace a person who holds place in my heart so there is no point of giving time of theirs to someone else in your WhatsApp chats or in life itself.Not everything is replaceable, atleast not humans.
So what and why are clear so far,now let’s come to the practical part which is how to achieve this communication barrier because you cannot isolate yourself completely which can hamper your overall growth,even for a week. Who knows, if universe planned something special for you and not able to reach you,just because there was no communication channel,haha.
So here were the alternative communication channels for me:
To stay connected with my mentors or people I am curious to learn from. I follow them on Instagram and through this channel I can just reach out to them at any point of time. (Because you can’t call them always). I ensure only to follow people whose post I am actually interested to see in my feed and not to just follow them because they are your colleagues,friends or are known to you and sent you requests.
To keep the professional networking going,I have my LinkedIn and even decided to improve my Engagement there directly with people. Although wants to avoid consuming too much content from LinkedIn feeds because that creates a sense of professional fomo .
The difficult part:
Ah, there is an urge to be felt part of crowd and community around you and I was kind of suspicious on my end that I will end up opening the whatsapp just because of this urge, so I created an alternative and installed Snapchat temporarily to have one way communication, communication where i decide to post things of life and not to consume information from others.Also,no unnecessary chats. The method is working so far but I think I am in better state to control this urge so I can get rid of snap again today.
Also,I believe if something is very urgent,people will call you for that and even calling is free just like messages in india so messengers are not essentialls,they are just more convenient form of communication.
What after a week
I am enjoying this process so far.Initially I decided to do this for a week and I have already achieved that but I am kind of liking it so will continue this for a little long.Also, I feel this has helped me on emotional level and I am in better state to focus on important stuff of life. This has added a little more stoic behaviour in me which I need just so not to be affected by each and every thing happening around me.
I am still having some sleepless nights but I am using them to learn something productive.By not using WhatsApp for a week I have realised the power of one way communication. When I started blogging my motive was same,to achieve power of one way communication because in that you are able to express without without being dependent on another person.Now with this action of not using whatsapp has improved on my faith for expression without seeking for reaction or attention.
Few facts from this week:
1) At midnight before I stopped using my WhatsApp I reached out to one of my elder brother like friend mentor when I was chocking out of fomo for some career advice and he immediately called me back and gave me the needed counseling. Feels great to have such figures around you. I have taken a screenshot of that call and have placed it as my Mobile display to remind me of few stuff ,one of which is ” that everyone’s story is different and you are in competition with no one”.
2) I clicked few good pictures of myself in my friends phone and had to actually use a Bluetooth after ages for taking those pictures, nostalgic…it’s still that slow.
3) I actually has to open whatsapp on Monday for 10 minutes,to wish my friend for her important day and see location of new cab mate to pick her up for office.
4) My phone vibrates with no notification when someone calls me on WhatsApp and I kind of enjoy guessing the person calling me in naughty way instead of replying (which i cannot obviously,if i am not using WhatsApp). Good thing,the person always called next time on my phone and I got to know the answer about who was calling,In most cases it was my mother or a cab driver (important people)
Curious now:
Are there still people who write letters to their dear ones? ,Will I ever receive a hand written letter
If there’s one topic that currently captivates my mind endlessly, it would undoubtedly be the concept of “change.” Anticipating the arrival of this year, I eagerly awaited the winds of change, for life had felt stagnant in the previous year. Now that I have begun to experience these transformations, a unique sentiment washes over me. I have come to the realization that these changes won’t come easily, especially when they involve significant shifts such as moving to a new house or changing jobs. Nonetheless, I remained optimistic, recognizing that these changes were ultimately for the better.
Having already experienced two major changes, namely a new job and a new home, I find myself engulfed in a whirlwind of emotions. On one hand, I feel a deep sense of satisfaction, having successfully orchestrated these changes precisely as I had envisioned last year. I transitioned to a job in the exact company I had manifested, reaching the same level of my aspirations. Furthermore, the opportunity to work from home was an unexpected bonus.
Similarly, I played a significant role in creating a new living space for my family, immersing myself in the profoundly impactful process. Undoubtedly, this journey has allowed me to grow as an individual. With the blessings of the divine, most aspects of the project unfolded as planned – from the financial aspects to the structure of the house and its location.
Additionally, I’ve managed to overcome the emotional barriers that I had built around myself last year, barriers that hindered my exploration of new experiences and prevented me from reconnecting with people and situations from the past. I have become emotionally available, ready to embrace all that life has to offer.
With everything seemingly perfect and aligned with my desires in the previous paragraphs, one might wonder what caused me to sit in a quiet corner of the room, feeling a slight restlessness that compelled me to jot down my thoughts for clarity. It was the realization of the “aftermath of change.” Until now, I had never considered the consequences that follow change. My focus had been solely on ensuring a smooth transition and preparing for any potential obstacles or unforeseen circumstances. I had never stopped to think about what would happen after things went according to plan – how would I feel then? Making the change happen seemed like the ultimate goal, but now I understand that experiencing the aftermath of change is just as significant.
During the process of building the house, excitement coursed through my veins. I envisioned sharing pictures with my loved ones as soon as it was ready, writing an entire blog detailing the journey, and creating reels to capture the essence of the experience. However, it has been nearly ten days since I moved into the new house, and I haven’t shared a single picture with even my closest companions. Perhaps this hesitancy arises from the fact that the feeling of change has now truly sunk in – after the event itself, not during its occurrence.
I have been wandering through the halls of this new, significantly larger house, appreciating all the wonderful aspects it offers. The spacious rooms, the expansive living area, the upgraded washrooms, the balcony I had always longed for, and even the walls painted in my favorite color – all of these reasons make me fond of this place. However, despite these positive attributes, a sense of unfamiliarity lingers. Small details like parking, interior design, and water supply trouble me more than I anticipated. Witnessing the puzzled expressions on my family members’ faces, who are undoubtedly undergoing a similar emotional transition, fills me with empathy both for them and for myself. I constantly remind them, and myself, that these temporary emotions will pass with time, that after a few days, we will begin to feel more at home. After all, we lived in our previous house for 18 years; it’s only natural that it will take us at least 18 days to adjust to a new place. I am aware of this reality and have been reassuring my family members of the same. I remain steadfast, sharing my emotional strength with them, knowing that in just a few more days, we will find ourselves more settled.
Throughout this entire journey, I have come to realize that change is not merely a sprint, where you strive to reach the finish line. Instead, it resembles a long and arduous marathon, where success is not only about reaching the end but also about navigating the challenges that come afterward. The true race begins after crossing the finish line.
Despite these temporary struggles, I maintain a positive outlook, knowing that soon we will all feel a sense of belonging and start focusing on the positive aspects of our new home. As I write these words, my heart brims with gratitude towards God for orchestrating these changes in a positive manner and granting me the strength to navigate through them.
With each new day, I awaken with an infectious surge of positive energy and an attitude that embraces life and its ever-changing nature. Hopefully, I will soon be able to share my heartfelt sentiments about feeling at home in our new abode.
Note: This article is from a teenager trying to address the challenges that teens like me must deal with during these formative years. It is my endeavor to ‘normalize’ this feeling in a way that is not taken for granted. It is not my role to advocate for right or wrong; it is my role to express feelings and emotions.
Cheers!
~
Dedication:
To all those at a crossroads in life. I feel you.
~
OMG. I can’t wait to turn 18
Gosh, I am so excited.
It’s going to be so much fun.
My parents can’t stop me.
I am gonna be free at last.
I can do so many things.
I can drink
I’ll dress the way I want.
Get me out of school already.
Collegeeeee…..here I come.
I am gonna party, like all the time!
My life won’t be like my parents’.
I want to everything!
I won’t be answerable to anybody.
I love reading romances! Should I be ashamed?
Am I a crackpot for finding solace in the bookish world and characters?
The idea of love sounds so magical.
Is reading even a hobby? Most think it’s laziness.
Oh god! Why is my dad/mum watching Arnab Goswami? or any debate for that matter? So annoying!
News is so boring.
Hopefully, I’ll wake up one day and magically, know what I want.
Ummm…okay maybe…just maybe I this policy is doing well. Maybe not.
Should I post this? Do I sound too political and stupid?
This is what I think…Is it wrong? Is it too radical?
Who casts vote anyway?
I’ll miss my friends.
Will I be able to make new ones?
What if I end up being a loner?
I don’t want to go to college.
My parents will probably understand my needs as an adult and not a child. Hopefully.
How do I tell them I don’t think like a kid anymore?
How do I make demands without feeling embarrassed?
Maybe I won’t be so shy anymore, right?
Maybe I won’t be judged if I talk about “TABOO” stuff.
Maybe intimacy is in cards for me now…maybe.
Don’t even get me started on the illegal shit.
Well, I am not quite eligible to buy a beer.
Okay, I really don’t know how the practical world works!
Like seriously, why would someone be excited about alcohol? It’s overhyped.
Okay, you know what?…maybe I prefer soda.
I mean… I am sure people won’t even blink an eye if I ordered something I have never ordered before. Right?!
At least I can drive around without supervision. (well at least for the ones who still act their age anyway.)
Guess what, I still love reading romances.
I don’t believe that romances are fiction.
They make me feel alive.
Will love pull me out of loneliness?
Does true love exist?
Even if I find love… Will I be able to be faithful?
How can one spend their life with the same person…forever?
Judgements shouldn’t bother an adult right?
I still don’t know shit.
I still hope that one day, I understand things around me, better at least.
I think I really love watching debates and the news.
Is it okay to have a political opinion?
I want the voter ID asap.
I am so gonna vote, honey!
I’ll post it anyway. Who cares?
I love having a common topic of a mature discussion with my parents.
I still have stage fear. How do they present so confidently way?!
Gosh, I miss being a kid. I feel like one.
Are these some of the many things going around in your head?
Well, guess what? You are not alone.
😉
Now, before getting into introspection…. let’s first dive into the million-dollar question…..(Okay well..maybe not a million-dollar question because we have a lot of theories and history that backs up this question that I am going to ask)—WHY?
Why was 18 (talking as an Indian) chosen as the Age of Majority?
If you want to know the theoretical details, this isn’t really the place for it. I am aiming at the ideology and the mental complexities that can be associated with this topic.
History—as we all know— is littered (okay, I do not mean it in a derogatory way because this girl right here loves history) with several instances of young and raw bravery, with young individuals taking up responsibilities far beyond their years— from Maharana Pratap to Shivaji and many more. The concept of Adulthood was quite relative back in the day. When someone was ready to take over various adult activities, the issue largely fell to their family to decide.
In today’s world?
Well…You know how it goes. Relativity has become a synonym of “loopholes” that can be exploited as the man (or woman…well…I believe in equality) sees worthy. Twisting words has become an art. This, my lovelies, calls for a need for a system. A system that specifies the role of these over-smart individuals in a serious setting. These aren’t made to redefine your personality, but to bring out the responsible side in you.
So what does the system do?
It specifies/declares a common age of majority— an age at which people can be categorized into the asset-building division. A threshold age, from where potentials can be harnessed.
But why literal age? Why not mental age?
The answer is quite simple actually.
Generations and generations of people throughout their lifespan have witnessed people age differently and at their own pace. We have seen immature, mature, observant, ignorant, responsible, lenient, harsh, kind, loveable, and even nagging people of the same literal age. These qualities in themselves are examples of how mental age and maturity can impact behavior, personality, and ultimately the kind of impact they may want on people. How we age mentally is absolutely relative (the oxymoron is hard to miss) to our upbringing and environment. On the other hand, the physical or the literal age is in the hands of time and therefore the constitution’s best friend for the sole purpose of bringing in regularity and assigning responsibilities for smoother administration.
As for how that specific number was reached…the answer is rather capricious. Arbitrary even.
One of them is the age at which most people seem to have graduated high school. They, generally, seem to exhibit a common understanding of themselves.
Now here’s a common mistake I’d like to address—Common understanding is not equal to having your life figured out!
It’s a fact that many, older and supposedly “wiser” folks haven’t figured out their true purpose in life. They, sadly, aren’t proud of their decisions. They barely even trust their decisions, regret comes much later.
Hey, but wait! Aren’t we likely to be much more developed mentally in, let’s say, 20 years from now? Wouldn’t that be more an appropriate time to become adults? Another question that is intrinsically woven with the former— ‘Does this mean our decisions at 25 won’t be as “correct” as those at 40?’
If I have to answer this set of questions in one word, I’ll go with— Relative. Well ideally, people continue to grow and mature their whole life. At least until our mind supports the process. So the 40-year-old you would probably not only be better ‘equipped’ to make decisions than your 25-year-old version but also in all likelihood be a very different person, both literally and mentally. Can this imply that my decisions at 25 will be any less “correct” than at 45? If you ask me? Personally, I don’t believe in “correct” or “incorrect” decisions when it comes down to it. My situation, environment, and mental state are going to be very different at 25 than at 40 (If not? I can pretty much pre-declare that I would be a waste of space. Period.). This means that my decision-making will obviously be a little different if not, much more modified. I’ll be much more ‘equipped’ by the time I have silver-foxy hair (at 40) despite both of these ages—25 and 40— being, the age of majority—legal age. This is precisely what I mean by ‘relative’. Now assuming that your decision at 25— which may I add, hasn’t even been taken yet!— will be “incorrect” when compared to your decisions, at say 40, is quite harsh. The keyword here is ‘equipped’ and not ‘correct’. You need to understand that your mindset and the spectrum of the crossroads that you will experience at 25 will be very different from that at 40. Why waste time judging and comparing yourself?
Tracking your evolution is very different from judging it.
Now writing from a minor teenager’s point of view, I have felt an uneasiness for quite some time now. The uneasiness of being trapped in a void. An intangible void. I thought about it for quite some time but couldn’t pinpoint the epicenter. But one day, while having a conversation with a friend of mine, something clicked. It’s a vague idea, but it is something. I was beginning to be able to sense it. So…I decided to share it!
It goes like this…
As adolescents on the brink of finishing high school, you feel caught up in the middle of a tug of war. One side—the nostalgic one—pulls you towards childhood and early adolescence, whereas on the other side we are being pushed towards the impending adulthood. And we often see this push as a burden. That could be because of all that you are surrounded by. But, why don’t you just take a minute, or two…or maybe even a couple of days and feel that gravitational pull towards adulthood. Weigh the pros and cons. I am sure our mind will focus exclusively on the cons, but ask your heart and question your purpose. Now don’t go asking ridiculous questions that focus on the superficial aspect of the phase you are about to enter or have entered already. How is your body responding to these questions?
Now, I have some revelations.
We have NEEDS.
NEEDS we didn’t have until yesterday. NEEDS we have today because we are aware, we are aware of ourselves and our surroundings. I am not even getting into the peer pressure aspect because those fall under WANTS. I am talking about what our soul craves. What our soul sees as passion. I am talking about the restlessness of just being still for so long, far too long. I am talking of the NEED to get out of those childish insecurities. Question yourself whether your current status is giving you the media to satisfy the fire within you, that fire that exists deep inside you, ask yourself if your current status is giving your the liberty to give back all that you have received over the years.
Now scroll back up to the top and read that list again. What does it look like to you now?
Can you now distinguish between your NEEDS and WANTS?
Can you now distinguish between your insecurities and the stability that you crave?
Do you now see a void that co-exists between these two phases in our lives?
While I am aware, that stability is something we have had since childhood… but I am talking about a different kind of stability… the stability of emotions. As kids, our emotions are all over the place and direction exists only with those with exposure. A lot of times, we are confused and the root cause is lack of exposure. We want the clouds to part away so that the Moonlight enters the window because it’s is dark and we NEED light. We are no longer just moody teenagers. We hold an understanding of our locality but have no rights. The understanding we didn’t have until yesterday or the week before. We have ideas but no outlet. We have gut feelings but nobody cares. We can sense and most importantly ‘distinguish’ the negative frequencies from the positive ones. We begin to understand individualism, teamwork, family, friends and tend to imagine a life without any of it. We now have a vague idea of what we want to see in ourselves in general. Maybe we don’t have a specific idea, because even I don’t know what I want, but I know that I’ll follow my heart with the support of my mind. We certainly know what we DON’T want. We understand that nothing except that extra, little nudge towards reality will ease our curiosity and eagerness. Ask yourself—”Am I looking forward to the beer that I’ll get to sip or to that acknowledgment that I am worthy of?”
If I seem to have ignored the perspective of the people sitting on the other side of the table, who are already doing what their heartbeats for, I truly am sorry. But you need to feel for the ones who are desperately waiting for their turn to come. You need to put yourself in the shoes of those who have had close to zero exposure. Just because you got that exposure and realized your passion, doesn’t mean that they would have also discovered their potentials along with you. You need to go back and relive those moments when your heart had cravings, cravings like those of people around you. I am not sorry for speaking for the ones who are caught in a void. We all come from different backgrounds and our early progress is ultimately dependent on it.
Eighteen is nothing when I look at those trivial desires. It is a fake promise and delusion.
Eighteen is everything and more when I look past those delusions and promises.
It’s frightening. But it’s realistic. The responsibilities may not come overnight but they’ll come. They’ll come with time.
My eighteenth is about me. It’s about my needs, not wants. I am excited to experience the world and make it mine. To put forth my opinions and work, out there, in the world. I am not excited for those tears and ugly falls, but
Eighteen is my first step outside the safe haven that my parents have created for me.
Eighteen is bittersweet, but it’s NOTHING. This is eighteen for me.
Some may not be excited for that day, the day they turn eighteen, but it’ll come.
You are probably living that life if you are older.
How you take it is in your hand. Whether you welcome it in the same way with the same warmth with which you have been doing for years or not, but this day will certainly be a nudge towards your modified persona in the future.
Now scroll back up, to the top and read that list again.
What does it look like to you now?
Are they merely just scratched and unscratched words?
Are you beginning to feel those tingles?
If not…I’ll try writing a better piece next time :).
Ask yourself AGAIN—”Am I looking forward to the beer that I’ll get to sip or to that acknowledgment that I am worthy of?”
So that ultimately leaves me with a question that I asked you in the beginning…..
What is in the number eighteen?
Until next time…..
With love,
Moon.
P.S Like I always say, if you’ve made it till the end of this, I love you more than I did when you first clicked on that link. It means the world to me.
P.P.S Considering today, the 16th of May, is the day I officially turn eighteen, I will admit, this piece is very special for me. The pleasure, the anxiety, and the eagerness that I had donned while writing this was voluntary. I realized, in its true sense and form, that happiness is a choice and I chose this. It’s amazing to have the upper hand in your own decisions.
P.P.P.S (Wait! It’s my last P.S!) If you loved reading my work, do not hesitate to share this with your friends and let me know what you have felt while reading, in the comment section down below give me any kind of suggestions that you might have. I welcome constructive criticism. Now I know that sometimes laziness takes over, especially with the idea of sharing, but when you feel active again…
Do share this and spread the word that She Speaks her Heart. Only.
Once upon a time (few minutes before) , in a cozy living room, three generations of a family gathered around a television. They were engrossed in a captivating story about two cats and a mischievous monkey. The eldest person, with wise eyes, was glued to the TV screen, but her gaze often shifted towards her granddaughter, driven by a dual purpose—to learn something new herself and to impart knowledge that she had missed out on during her own childhood.
It wasn’t the first time I had noticed a twinge of regret on her face, as if she longed for the opportunities she never had. However, this time, there was something different. Despite her wistful thoughts, a gentle smile graced her lips as she watched her granddaughter recite a poem, while adorably mimicking a monkey’s antics.
Little did the innocent four-year-old granddaughter realize the profound impact she had on the old lady. Her spirit and genuine performance brought immense joy and a renewed sense of pride to her grandmother. The 25-year-old translator, who sat alongside them, seized the precious moment, capturing the exchange on his camera. In that very instant, a deep fulfillment washed over the translator’s heart, for him it was not merely witnessing an act of love between two generations but also bridging the gap between languages—connecting the English poem and its Hindi meaning.
As the cat and monkey story unfolded, teaching the valuable moral of sharing happiness, the translator couldn’t help but share his own happiness with his other loved ones. He forwarded the heartwarming scene to his father, brother, and sister-in-law over WhatsApp, extending the joyous connection beyond the living room.
In this small but profound moment, the power of storytelling, love, and family intertwined. The TV became a source of knowledge and shared experiences, while the granddaughter unknowingly became a carrier of happiness for her grandmother. The translator,yes that’s me, embracing my role as a bridge, not only translated words but also bridged the living room act with the heartfelt smiles of three people, illuminated by a simple WhatsApp message.
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We are trying to create a community where everyone learn from each other instead of competing with each other. We want to create a community which is interested in books …
5:24 am: In about half an hour result of my first professional exam is to be declared and on this cold morning I am accompanied by my best friend, people call him fear.
My best friend,Fear:
Fear is my best friend since childhood, my mom and the world other than my mom never liked him and used to tell me to part my way with him since the start. They were ware about my closeness and my long relationship with fear, that used to bother them. Often they used to make me count what all could go wrong if I don’t let go of him. They knew he was not the right person to be around but so did I knew, but it’s not easy to leave someone who has been there with you at your lows and sometimes even at highs.
To a certain extent, I always agreed to their point that he was not right for me and at times even tried parting my ways with him. I tried many self-help books, seminars, YouTube videos, and a lot of others things to separate myself from him but was always unsuccessful. In fact, with time my bond with him kept on growing, we can say it was a one-sided love story where I always wanted to get rid of him but he will never let go of me. Often I used to cry about toxicity he used to bring with him. As a result, I stopped doing things I like, I stopped being with people I love, I started avoiding the life-changing situation and all because of him. Often I used to cry at night because of the toxic relationship I came into with my best friend, Fear.
Another side to Fear
But there was another side to this relationship with fear. I was a person with a lot of friends. I used to listen to my friends and be there with them at their lows but sadly they never were there in mine. When tough times used to come and I needed someone really bad there used to be only one person around me, my best friend fear. This was the reason my fondness for him kept on growing, he was harming me to great extent but he was always there with me when I needed someone. This makes me realize now why people do cigarettes and drugs even when they know it causes cancer. My best friend was my addiction now.
Fear and I were together whenever there used to be an argument between my parents, whenever my brother used to scold me, whenever I have to give a public speech, whenever I used to get close to my dear ones. There were times when other friends of mine like courage, bravery, blunt talk used to lend me their support and made me believe that I could handle these situations better but their opinions used to be less important to me when compared to the advice given by my best friend fear and this way our bond kept on getting stronger with time.
Shades of Fear:
In school, I used to fear results and the consequences they can bring with them thus I used to work hard to get good marks.My fear was at its peak in the last year of school which lead to me working harder and passing my final year of school with flying colors. In college I used to fear about career start, I always knew I didn’t have the finances to start something of my own and was not buying the idea of doing an MBA straight out of college so the only option left with me was of doing a corporate job which was hard to get in my college, I started fearing the consequences of being jobless and future less thus I started working harder, I did 19+ internship, college societies, startups and studies, all this to be an outlier when college ends.
All this paid off and I was only amongst the two-three people in my course that year who got placed in a dream company. So you see fear is not all so bad, I started coming to terms with it. However in my personal life, things started getting bad from here and fear was making them worse, it was second day of my office and I found myself sitting in the middle of the cyber hub crying in a way that no one notices, talking to new friends from office while trying to keep my face straight. Life started throwing real challenges towards me and I was shattered, fear even made it worst for me and it was this time that I realized that my mom and others were right about fear. In a bad situation, fear will tear your hope and at times even your willingness to continue anything, absolutely anything.
My breakup with fear:
I was in my bed with my face pressed against a pillow, I was sad and crying for hours. I wanted to confront my family member on one personal issue but then I wanted to do this for years but my fear never let me do that. My phone rang at that time and it was my real best friend, let’s call her guiding angel for now. I broke down on call and told her what I was going through she advised me to talk to my family member but I was scared,very scared. We had a call of 20-30 minutes and she infused some real courage in me for this moment, I don’t know if my fear was taking a power nap or what at that time. I finally decided to talk to my family member and ……we talked few things out. It wasn’t like our half-hour conversation changed the whole situation but I felt better, I felt free, I knew whatever be it from here, I will face it with more subtleness. From that day on I broke up with my fear, it might sound odd but yes, a half an hour conversation can bring such a big difference to your life.
Subtleness:
I was a new man, with a lot more confidence, courage, and hard working attitude. I started settling down professionally and in my personal life. I considered myself to be in a better mindset now and even started giving Ted talks to my friends. I started “seeing an ant-like an ant and not an elephant”. I was curious to learn new things and was not missing on any opportunities that come my way. In short, I was in a flow state.
All was going well for me till the time a similar situation like the one where I broke up with my fear came along with enrolling myself in a professional exam. I gave my exam and even handled the situation and I failed at both i guess. It wasn’t like I didn’t work hard for my exam this time and not that I was any less courageous this time to handle the situation still result was not different,it was not good. It wasn’t like one exam or instance of failure was bothering me but the fact that I was taking that result casually or what I call “subtleness” was bothering me. I was taking everything casually and was not bothered about the results and consequences at all. I wanted to be in a flow state but this was something else maybe I was on edge of becoming overconfident, careless and that was bothering me. I was working hard like always but still was not giving my 100% in those crucial moments. This was making me sick.
It was very late that I realized that there was an important ingredient missing from the winning formula that I had before, that was my best friend fear.
Balancing Fear:
Now I realize fear is a two-way knife:
If we make fear our best friend we end up losing on a lot of opportunities, we end up being underconfident, over conscious, and over procrastinating.
On other hand, if we make our fear stranger to us, we end up being careless, lenient, and less motivated.
So, how can we come to terms with fear? How to make fear work positively for us? These were the questions that were coming to my mind and I decided to find answers to them. After a lot of research, watching a lot of Ted Talk, and many nights of brainstorming, I got my answer. The answer was to find a break-even point with fear.
One should not be a stranger to fear (careless) or be a best friend to it (underconfident) instead one should find a balance between these two, the break-even where you can use this fear for your benefit, as a motivation to you.
Drawing this balance will not be easy and I haven’t found it yet but I am sure I will do it soon and now that I know my fear better I know that he is adamant and will never let me be alone. I don’t know if I like this quality of him or I hate it but he is always with me so I have decided to use it for my own benefit ~ as a constant motivation.
Will keep you guys updated about the progress…..
PS: I passed one exam and need to reappear in other.
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